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I think that because it is winter in Vermont, all of us need a good laugh, so I thought that I would tell you about my “life,” at least the last two weeks of it! So, here goes…
I have had terrible pains in my hands since, oh, probably October. We are not talking about a little pain and strain, I am talking about excruciating pain, especially at night. I discussed these pains with my doctor and at her suggestion, I tried to get an appointment with a “hand” doctor. Well, that sounded OK with me but what I didn’t know was getting an appointment just isn’t that easy! When I finally tried, I was told that in order to see the doctor you had to wait four months, but I could see his assistant sooner. So rather than chew off my own hands, I decided to go see her… and that took quite a while anyway. I did go see her and she was really, really good but in order to be sure what was wrong with my hands, I had to go see a neurologist. I did that and even I was surprised when he told me that I had gotten there “just in time” and if I had waited, my hands couldn’t be fixed! Just what I wanted to hear. But the good news is that they can be fixed and will be soon.
I have had a strange fall/winter. Instead of doing what I usually have done, I have sort of sat around, done a little reading, and hibernated. And then early in January I had an epiphany and decided it was time to move my tail and get back to life. I was invited by several very old friends, Chloe, Betsy, Mary Jane and Melissa (can you tell by our names how old we are - not a Madison, a Zuma or a Schwanda among us!) to go and join them in a water class at The Bridges here in Warren, at 6:00 one evening. Chloe would pick me up, so I had no excuse for not going. And I had such a great time. We paddled around for an hour and really caught up.
And then, it happened. I went to get out of the pool and I didn’t give a single thought to my hands or anything else. I went up step one, step two, and when I got to step three I realized it was quite a bit bigger (or taller), and I couldn’t really make it up. I was embarrassed enough but when I tried to grab the railing, of course, my hand couldn’t hold and I slipped, like a big dying whale, scraped my shin on the side of the pool, and fell back into the water. I was only able to get out when a friend (how good can a friend be?) had to shove my a** up and out of the water. Of course, now my leg was bleeding like I had cut off my foot, but I grabbed my towel and wrapped it around my leg.
No problem, right? Well, it wasn’t too bad until I got into the dressing room and found several women who I didn’t know were there. One of them saw my bleeding leg, was horrified, and ran and got bandages from the desk. She then proceeded to bandage me up! This is sort of the end of the story, humiliation-wise, but I did go to the doctor’s the next day for something else and I showed her my wound. She said that I was doing the right thing and that I should keep it slathered with Neosporin and bandaged. And no swimming or pool until it was completely healed. “Because we don’t want it to get infected, right?” And the thought of amputation in my future is really a no brainier!
Just an afterthought for you is this - do you have any idea how much and how often you use your hands? That there is no relief for severe Carpel Tunnel Syndrome is amazing to me. We can send men to the moon but can’ figure out how to let an old woman sleep at night until surgery. Oh well, the good news is that there is surgery to fix the problem and it is anticipated that most, if not all, pain will be relieved. Boy, I hope so. But, you know, you have to laugh whenever you can, and if you can’t laugh at the image of an old, fat, pathetic woman in a bathing suit trying to get out of a pool, you obviously have no sense of humor!
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